Some may find it challenging to build up confidence in a relationship. There are many simple yet powerful ways you can take advantage of to feel more confident about your relationship instantly. These tips can help turn things around no matter how low-spirited you are.
You have got to know that how you feel about yourself affects your relationship to a large extent. Feel bad about yourself, and you are likely to feel unworthy of the love you are getting from your partner. This will show up as deep insecurity, as you will be clingy and always seek validation from your partner even when they walk over you.
For this reason, you have to work on your confidence whilst in your relationship. You want to be that confident person who loves themselves and their partner, void of insecurities. Are you low on confidence? Here are 15 ways to boost confidence in your relationship:
1. The Inner Critic
Almost every one of us has an inner critic. For some of us, the voice of the critic is low. But for others, due to weeks and months of doing nothing about it, the voice becomes loud and much more persuasive.
To improve your confidence in your relationship, work on silencing your inner critic. It is all in your mind, and you have got the power to let it know when you have had enough.
Don’t talk down on yourself. If you catch yourself doing so, take a U-turn and try as much as you can to keep it from happening again.
2. Your Views of Beauty Have to Change
One of the reasons people struggle with a lack of self-confidence, especially in their relationships, is: that they have such a skewered sense of what beauty is.
You should know that no one’s definition of beauty matters as much as yours. You live in your own world, and what you map out for yourself matters so much.
Don’t think that beauty is just seen in slender legs or sinewy arms. Beauty is also your curved legs and your thin arms. Come to accept this fact and embrace your beauty.
3. No Comparison
The truth is, your partner is going to meet a lot of beautiful people every day. That is fine. But you know what is not fine? Comparing yourself to them.
Comparison is like a massive leak. It drains your confidence really quickly and will have you being insecure and not self-confident.
Do not ask your partner who that beautiful girl he was texting earlier was. Do not look at her pictures and say: I want to be that way.
No, just embrace your own definition of beautiful. Beautiful is you. Only that should count.
4. Work on Your Self-Esteem
Your confidence rises and falls on your self-esteem. Simply put, your self-esteem is how you feel about yourself. Someone who has low self-esteem will most of the time, feel bad about themselves.
This feeling is sure going to find its way into their relationship and, as we mentioned in the introduction, cause some damage.
Work on your self-esteem by trying as much as you can to allow only good feelings about yourself.
Do stuff you love, and say stuff you love. Works quick. The more you feel good about yourself, the better your confidence.
5. Compliment Your Partner
One of the ways to build confidence in a relationship is seen in complimenting your partner.
Compliments are such good energy that they don’t only work to make your partner feel good about themselves. They also make you feel good about yourself.
When you can see the beautiful side of someone else, it becomes a lot easier to see the good side in yourself. And when you can see the good in yourself, your confidence improves so much.
When next your partner puts on a dress or clothes you love, be sure to compliment them.
6. Put on Clothes You Love
This is where many people miss it. Look. The fact that a dress or a shirt looks good doesn’t mean that you love it.
Do not put on clothes because they are trendy or because they look good on someone on the internet. Put on clothes because they look good on you and you love them.
When you love your clothes, you’ll love your looks throughout that day. This is going to show in your body language. You’ll feel like the perfect person.
You should feel this way most days in every week, you know?
7. Embrace the Fact That Your Partner is Attracted to You
There are at least five people your partner could have come after and sought a relationship with. But they sought a relationship with you.
Think it a coincidence? I don’t think so.
Your lack of confidence will try as much as possible to make you feel that your partner is settling for you. Ignore this. It is just too far from the truth.
Your partner is with you because they actually feel attracted to you. And this attraction is likely intense and very genuine. Just as you are attracted to them, they, too, are attracted to you.
Exercise can affect the way you view yourself.
Most exercise routines are like setting goals. For example, if you are a jogger, you’ll have at some point mapped out how far you will be running that day.
This is a goal. And when you achieve it, you’ll sure feel good about yourself.
Exercising with your partner is a great way to improve confidence in your relationship. When you both can work something out together, you know you are a team and can pull through the relationship.
Read: My Covid-19 Experience
9. Seek Compliments from Your Partner
What better than a compliment from someone who is in love with you?
Seeking compliments from your partner is surely going to make your confidence in yourself and that relationship spike.
When next you put on that nice clothing or have that nightshirt on, walk over to your partner and ask them what they think about it.
Observe how you feel when they let you know they love it so much. Feels good, yeah? That is exactly how you should feel about yourself and your relationship most of the time.
10. Don’t Depend on Validation from Your Partner
Whilst compliments are a big part of healthy relationships; one should not be pathologically dependent on validation from their partner.
Yes, it is great to ask your partner about your looks. To seek their compliments. But, it sure becomes bad when you can’t feel good about yourself if they don’t compliment you.
What happens when they are not there? Well, let me guess: you go back to feeling as though you don’t matter. You don’t want that.
You want to feel good, look good, smell good, and be confident that you are every one of these things.
11. Smell Good
Smelling good is also a great way to feel confident in your relationship. In fact, you just can’t avoid it, as it is not an option but a necessity.
Smell good, and be intentional about it.
Brush and flush as often as you choose, and carry a mouth wash with you. Do not wear one cloth more than once. Make sure you wash it.
Have a bath twice daily; I suggest you bathe whenever you start to feel grime. There shouldn’t be a number. Just bath whenever you want.
Use a cologne too.
This is for men. Your beard can cause you confidence problems when it isn’t well-groomed.
First, you are going to feel tattered. This feeling may be subtle, but your subconscious is usually able to sniff it out and magnify it so much it becomes a problem.
Have you noticed that you feel a bit edgy and uneasy when your beard is bushy? That is your unconscious mind getting the hang of things.
Have a good shave. Take out every hair you are uncomfortable with. Armpit hair. Groin hair. Facial hair. Trim all.
13. Learn to Take Criticism
Sometimes, even your partner is going to criticize you and the way you look. You should learn to take criticism without making things personal and drowning in self-hate.
Not everyone is going to like the way you look all the time. Realize, and come to terms with this—it is healthy for your relationship.
When your partner says they don’t like a look on you, they are not saying that they no longer like you. They are only saying they don’t like the look. It is not deeper than that.
Wave it off with a confident smile and remind yourself that you are just amazing.
14. Body Language
Your body language has a lot to do with your confidence. A healthy body language is going to translate to healthy feelings about yourself and your relationship—Vice versa.
Wear a nice smile as often as possible. Don’t walk with your shoulders low. Keep your head high.
When you are with your partner, maintain healthy body communication. Hold hands when you walk. Be fine with hugging each other, even in public.
In fact, showing affection in public, and to the degree, you both are fine with, just might help boost confidence in the relationship and in yourself.
15. How are Things in The Bedroom?
Like the many things mentioned so far, your bedroom routine is going to affect your relationship and your confidence.
If things are going on a bit weird in the bedroom, you may find that you become less confident. That you no longer feel so good about yourself and may even think that your partner now dislikes you.
Relationships without intimacy can lead to feelings of loneliness and resentment. Intimacy increases your overall well-being and can also boost sexual confidence.
Photo by Taisiia Stupak on Unsplash