In most relationships, there almost always comes a time when intimacy takes a hit. Things don’t go as smoothly as they used to, and both partners start to experience some kind of decline in their intimacy. If you and your partner are in this phase, here are 15 ways to bring the intimacy back into the relationship:
1. Communicate More
Many times, intimacy declines because there is something that has changed about the way you communicate with each other.
It may be that you don’t talk as often as you used to, or you feel as though you are not being listened to enough. Or, just maybe, there is hurt somewhere that hasn’t been expressed.
Work on this. Talk more. Express your hurts. Embrace vulnerability when communicating.
2. Build tension
Tension is a great way to work intimacy.
When we say tension, we mean a very strong desire between you both.
There are many ways to build tension, but one of the easiest ways is to make your company so warm your partner just can’t stop missing you.
Listen more. Compliment. Flirt. Become everything your partner wants to be around.
3. Change The Sex Routine
Sometimes, sex just gets boring because you keep repeating the same routines over and over. It helps to embrace some change.
Be ready to explore more.
Work on the foreplay. This is a very important part of sex, as it builds so much tension the actual sex becomes quite enjoyable.
Explore your partner’s kinks.
4. Talk About Sex
Do not for a second believe that since you and your partner have been around for a long time, you two do not have to talk about sex anymore.
Of course, you both still have to talk about sex.
Bring the spark back by talking about sex. Explore your kinks together. What does your partner like to do in bed? What would they rather do?
5. Random Touches
Yes! Touch is an important part of sexual relationships. When we touch people we love, our bodies respond by making and transporting hormones that make us feel even more attracted to them.
Touch your partner. There doesn’t have to be a reason for it. Just walk over there and touch their hands.
Hug them more in private and in public alike. Touch.
Do you just get off the bed and go about your usual activities soon after sex? If yes, then it is probably this behavior that is killing the intimacy in your relationship.
Cuddle your partner after sex.
Do not just let them lie there alone. Lay with them, and have their body against yours. Rub and keep rubbing. And remember? There is no better time to have a great and sensual conversation with your partner than when you are cuddling them.
7. Create More Time for Your Relationship
Many relationships start to lose intimacy when one partner starts to get ‘too busy.’
This happens because sex may start to feel one-sided and rushed. The partner who isn’t busy may feel used by the one who is because they would feel that this one is just using them to attain orgasm. Nothing more.
8. Your Partner Has to Feel It Too
One of the worse things you can do during sex, especially sex with a romantic partner, is to be selfish.
This drops the intimacy real quick.
If this is the reason for a decline in intimacy with your partner, then all you need to do is pay attention to your partner’s sexual needs too, and the intimacy will return.
During sex, make sure they enjoy it too.
Memories can bring intimacy back, especially when they are communicated effectively.
Remember the time when sex with your partner used to feel so great you hoped to have sex as often as possible? Talk about those times.
Talk about the last sex you had and how they had pulled off a move that blew your mind. Ask if they want to try it again and laugh.
The goal is to make sure the sex is quite intense. And one of the ways to achieve this goal is to include music in your sex routines.
When next you have sex with your partner, have some cool, romantic music playing in the background.
I am telling you, it makes things a lot more intense and more intimate. It makes you want to have more sex and more often.
11. Don’t Point Out Your Partner’s Flaws
If your partner feels as though they are not good enough for you in bed, they are going to avoid you so much it becomes a problem even to initiate, talk less of sustain sex.
So, avoid pointing out your partner’s flaws, especially in a way that is scornful. Just don’t do it.
Teach: instead of pointing out your partner’s flaws in bed, compliment their good side.
At least they do something that makes you feel really good. Point that thing out. Describe how much you loved it and want to try it again.
Also, teach them. Don’t be afraid to talk about your body or describe your sexual needs. Tell them that this is where you want to be touched. Show them how.
When sex is teamwork, it is most likely to be intimate.
13. Initiate sex
Don’t be afraid to initiate sex, and let your partner know that they are allowed to initiate sex whenever they want to.
Understand that sex is a great thing, and partners should not be scared to seek it. They should be comfortable enough to be intimate.
Anytime they want, even.
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14. Spice Up Your Relationship
It helps, really, to spice up your relationship.
A lot of times, what happens with your sex life is a representation of what actually happens in the relationship.
If the relationship is doing well, then the sex and intimacy will do great as well—Vice versa.
15. A Massage
Tantric and erotic massage can be helpful to bring your intimacy back. How about you try it?
Learn how to do a massage and perform the procedure on your partner. Let the massage sessions end in sex that have you both wowing and awnnnning.
Bonus: Sex therapy might just be all the help you need if it all just isn’t working.
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